The One

I got this from Yen's blog and I thought of posting this here. This is really nice.

5 easy things you can do now to help you find ‘the one’:

1. Love yourself. Yes, you read right. It’s a simple statement and yet it can be quite contentious. How can I love myself? I should love others before me. The very reason I’m looking for someone to love is so they can love me. To each their own - that’s what I will always say. Just take my word with a grain of salt and ponder it a little. My question to you is: how can you expect someone to love you if you don’t love yourself? Sometimes the other person needs to know why they should love you. What is so lovable about you? And they will see this, feel this, think this if you communicate this energy to them - that you love yourself.

How do you do this?

a. Make a list of the things you like about yourself - physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually, socially, etc
b. Ask other people what they like about you, in case you missed a few
c. What are your passions? Do you nurture them? When you do things that make you happy, fulfill you, you feel happiness that comes from within. And this shines through.

Loving yourself is also vital because then it keeps you from selling yourself short. You know that you deserve respect and won’t stand for people taking you for granted, insulting you or abusing your good nature. Loving yourself means never getting to the point of desperation that throw yourself at anyone who so much as casts a glance your way.

2. Listen to Socrates: Know thyself. Knowing yourself means being aware of

a. what makes you smile
b. what makes you glow
c. what you appreciate in others
d. your likes and dislikes
e. your dreams and desperations
f. your joys and tribulations

When you know yourself, you know what you want. And this makes the next step possible.

3. Draw up a list. What kind of person would you like to share your life with? Try to be as specific as possible. The reason for this is NOT to make you stick to them, but simply to guide you and remind you in your quest, your journey towards ‘your one’. Many a time people seem to get so lost in the labyrinth of finding a life partner, that they end up settling. Sometimes though someone may surprise you, that even though they may not be 6 feet tall, or have a 36-24-36 measurement, a fat bank balance or an arresting smile when they show their pearly whites, they still could be the one. Ask yourself a few simple questions. Does the person make you look forward to seeing them again? Do they make you feel good about yourself? Do they inspire you to be a better person when in their company? If the answer is yes, then give them a chance.

4. Go out and socialise - not necessarily to hunt for ‘your one’ but to meet people, enjoy the company of others, live life. All of us are social beings and without human contact we lose some of that human-ness. And yes, of course it helps to link up with people who may actually one day say to you, “I have a friend. I think you should meet!”

So where can you meet people? Do you go to the gym? It’s a good place to keep fit and rub elbows with health buffs (or people so in love with themselves). What are your hobbies? Do you play tennis? Do you belong to a club? Is there something you’ve always wanted to learn but never pursued it - play the guitar, explore photography, go mountain climbing, or scuba dive? Whatever happens you still come out a winner because you learn a new skill, you meet new people and you may start new friendships. Also, you become a more interesting person both to yourself and to others.

5. Keep busy. You don’t have to hold your breath waiting for ‘your one’ to make an appearance. You know what they say about watching a pot boil? It never does. More often than not, love happens when you least expect it. Hopefully by keeping busy you don’t end up being too busy for love. Leave enough room for love to come into your life.